Random Thoughts (Sophie)

My thoughts and the things that comes in mind in time when I am alone never cease to surprise me
It's seems that God knew why he made me the only child.
You may say, I am self-centered? Believe me there are days when I do feel the urge of being lavish with love (okay i do admit I sounded way to exaggerated here) but frankly we all have those day, but I do not make it an habit since I know for sure the world does not revolve around me.

Just lately, I am realizing how babilish, or should I dare to say how childish I sound whenever I am talking about my latest interest who is a young man.(I prefer to call them my latest victims) Most of my friends when they tell me about their side of their stories, I remark that they engage with the person whom they are starting to feel closer to, either as their friend, or getting to go on the path where it leads to a relationship.
However when it is my time to tell them about my guy, or my latest victim it sounds like the story of a girl in the 8th grade, struggling to gain some air time to the guy that she has a crush on.
Although advices from friends such as
"Make him notice you...talk to him Sophs....flirt with him....Just be yourself"?
Those advices fail to be successful. Come on people I am trying.
Bam! there goes that word...Crush...I mean should I even use it at my age?
It sounds so immature and have you examine that word
Crush....it should bring you to the feeling of depression, hurt and agony,
Yet as I am trying to leave that juvenile word behind, the next word that pops in mind is attraction.
Hmm, still it sounds as if i am referring to that young man (my latest victim) as of piece of meat or piece of candy. Therefore instead of calling it a crush or attraction I call it, "Sophie's latest Victim"
I even had a childish remarks about those types of crushes and often criticized for not having a boyfriend.

The point is, I don't think I want to use the word Crush because seriously, enough with the childish games
yet I do not want to use the word attraction because of me referring him as a piece of meat.

Here is to not sounding Juvenile any longer :)